Speaking English
How to report a theft to the police, in English
If you are in the chair right now
My bag's been stolen. I'd like to report a theft.
Present perfect — the tense English reserves for fresh news that still matters.
If that gets brushed off
About an hour ago, on the subway. My phone, wallet and keys were inside.
Place, time, contents — the three things the officer needs before anything can happen.
«Has been stolen», not «was stolen» — the present perfect marks news that is still hot, and switching to «was» ages it. Before you leave, get the report number: US police report, UK crime reference number. Insurance will ask for nothing else first.
Nobody plans for this, and it arrives at the worst possible moment for grammar: you are rattled, your phone is gone, and the first sentence you need happens to be in the one tense English learners avoid. It is worth having that sentence ready before you ever need it.
If you need more than one line
neutral
My wallet's been stolen.
Swap in: phone, backpack, passport.
neutral
I'd like to report a theft.
Report a theft / file a report — the fixed phrases the desk expects.
neutral
It happened this morning, near the station.
Once you are narrating the details, simple past takes over — «it happened», «I left it», «I noticed».
firmest
Could I get a copy of the report for my insurance?
The reason you came, and the visit is not over until you have it.
Two things worth knowing
This is the one conversation you will have while too rattled to think about tense.
The present perfect is the breaking-news tense
«My bag has been stolen» announces fresh news with live consequences; «my bag was stolen» states a historical fact. English speakers slide from one to the other inside a single conversation — perfect for the headline, simple past for the details — and that slide is the natural rhythm of a police report: has been stolen; it happened around nine; I noticed when I got off.
The number is the deliverable
Everything downstream of the crime wants one artifact: the police report number in the US, the crime reference number in the UK. Insurance claims, embassy paperwork, phone replacements — all of them open with it. «Could I get a copy of the report?» or «could I take the reference number?» is the sentence that ends the visit properly, and the officer is waiting for you to ask.
What Sergeant Doyle actually said
What you have to get done
- Report what was taken and where
- Describe the bag and its contents
- Answer questions about the timing
Sergeant Doyle
Officers open with calm — the answer they need is the headline, not the story.
You
What, where, when — the whole report in one sentence.
Sergeant Doyle
The follow-up questions arrive in the same order you'd volunteer them.
You
Colour, size, material, contents — the description an officer can actually circulate.
Sergeant Doyle
The report is open — the copy and its number are what to leave with.
The whole conversation, unedited
A real run in the app, nothing scripted on the officer's side. The transcript above is taken from this recording, and the objectives tick off on screen as they are met.
Turn sound on to hear it.
Now say it yourself
Reading that is not the same as producing it with someone waiting, which is the entire difficulty. You can have this exact conversation in the app: Sergeant Doyle is a third of the way through, and you have three things to get done.
It is free, it takes about a minute to start, and the first attempt is allowed to be terrible.
Practise this conversation
